Sandy’s Story: Overcoming Lies

All Glory to God.

I thank God for everything. This is the most important class in my life ever, He chose me to attend this class.

When I felt so vulnerable, weak, overwhelmed and undeserved, He still chose me. I almost quit, but he called me back again and again, even at times when I did not deserve it, despite many good candidates in my church, and despite the many challenges I faced before entering Bible College to start my first class. But God never gave up on me. He uses the gentlest ways to assure me again and again that He has a calling for me. Before this class, I thought God chose the wrong person, but there was a small voice that reminded me “does God really make any wrong decisions?”.

I continued to pray and took a leap of faith to register this course. The name of the lecturer looked so amazing to me and looking at the name of the course, I felt there is a hope inside of me. I trusted in Him that everything will be fine. Looking back over the past few weeks, especially the two weeks of night classes, I can see now that God really heard my prayers and Dr. Cherlene’s prayers. God protected us from our heads to our toes in making sure that we could attend the classes safely and go back home safely. Hallelujah!

After this course, I feel so amazed. I now know that I have been living in lies for many years, and especially for the last 8 months. I felt so angry because the devil had stolen my joy, my peace and my freedom. The devil made my life so bitter and at a certain point even attending church every weekend would stress me. Looking back at my old self and comparing that to the new me right now, I can see and feel that I have been transformed by God’s grace and love.

I thank Dr. Cherlene for using such powerful examples to describe a father’s love. We are not afraid of our parents when we take food from our fridge, and same goes for our Heavenly Father. He will never scold us because we want to take something from Him. I honour my Father because He is so kind to me.

My life has changed because I am not a slave to sin anymore. My church and my family are still loved by Him, and I pray for the sisters in Christ who hurt me. I pray for forgiveness from God and I’m willing to put down all my pride and all the perceptions of justice that I have in me. I pray for my sisters, that God heals them and talks to them as well. I have refreshed my mind, I do not care how people look at me or think of me, because the Bible teaches us to think of God anywhere, anytime. He cares for me and He loves me so much that He died for me. I am God’s precious daughter, He wants the best for me. He is the one I want to please. He is the one I want to talk to and listen to, and He will never make mistakes. No one can separate me from the love of God. He has refreshed, renewed, and reprogrammed my mind.

There is a lesson I have learnt from Dr. Cherlene: “Come with expectation, be earnest in learning, be humble and hunger for Him at all times. Ask and it shall be given and knowing my new identity in God is the best gift ever. Seeking for Jesus, He will never disappoint me.” And Yes! Dr. Cherlene. I have changed, and I have been transformed after the class. Thank you Jesus, Thank you Dr. Cherlene, I am no longer living in doubts and self-induced insecurity. My life is wonderful and full of sweetness.

I remember saying in the class “I cannot wait to share the truth that I have learnt from God’s word, I want them to be set free as well”. One day, one of my leader’s came to me and requested to have a dinner, so we went to a restaurant. That evening I could feel God amongst us, my leader still cared about me and we had really good fellowship that night. God is so amazing, He listens to our prayers. He responds in an appropriate and gentle way. Finally, I was able to have the chance to talk to my leader and I felt God’s love so well and received great blessings from Him.

Writing journals is a wonderful way for me to prove that God is walking with me and is a witness that God has transformed my life. Looking back at my journal and the testimony that I have written, my heart is jumping with joy. God gave me a picture that he is the carpenter and he is shaping me. He is sitting in front of me and I can sense that he is so focused because he is shaping me. After that, he nodded his head and said “Perfect”, then he breathed out the spirit in me and said, “I love you, daughter. But do you really know me? Do you know I am your Father?”. Then He reminds me of the day He called me to follow Him. I remember this broke my heart and I cried out to Him; “Thank you Jesus. My genes, my life, my generation, my heart, my soul, my body and my mind belong to Jesus Christ. I’ve regained my identity and I am not going to lose it again, I am a child of God.”

There is a lot of testimonies in my life after this class, my Mom and I came to God and surrendered our family to God, we declared we are not depressed, we are not anxious, we are full of joy and peace, and I declared that my Mom will overcome all these fears by God’s love. She will receive the peace and freedom from our Father. I found that my own behaviour has changed a lot, I kneel down for my family in front of God instead of keeping lies and hatred in my heart, I praise God when the environment is not good, and God has genuinely changed my heart and thoughts. I love my parents, I am so blessed that God is looking after us. Nothing worries me, because He is with us.

During movement control order in Malaysia, all work and meetings had to be done online, and I found myself having miscommunications with my manager. Because of this I decided to write a message to her, however my heart was full of anxiety and worry because I was so afraid that my manager might be offended or I might be fired in this situation of crisis. But my heart felt that I needed to communicate what I was feeling in order to improve our system and benefit our company. I asked my boyfriend to pray for me, and he prayed and upheld everything to God. He wanted me to pray for myself on the phone, so I declared that God will give us peace and cast out all this anxiety, worry and negative thoughts. I submitted everything into His hands. I know my parents also prayed for me as well. Eventually I sent my message to my manager. After I sent the message out, my manager gave me a call and she thanked me for bringing this concern to her. She totally understood my situation, and she responded in a way that was so lovely and friendly. In the end, we not only settled our miscommunication, but we also prayed for one another’s burdens. I thank you Lord for being so faithful even at times when I am faithless. I know He is always a way maker, miracle worker and promise keeper.

Lastly, God is good all the time and all the time God is good, and I pray that God will continue to watch over Dr. Cherlene and her family. He will guide and protect all of our footsteps. I hope Dr. Cherlene is doing well out there, may your work keep on shining for Him. I thank you Lord for sending a beautiful angel in my life. Hope to see you soon, Dr. Cherlene.

Shalom.

Sandy